Monday, March 14, 2005

#$&@#*&^#@*^$*&@

First, coinkydink. Klipper, I was just discussing The Aristocrats with a friend last night. If there's any reason a child should hear that joke, it's because it will help his critical thinking skills. Children are too innocent and full of wonder to be offended at that joke. The first thing they would think is, "I don't get it." It has an anti-punchline, and it would force a child to ask why it was being told in the first place. It takes a certain amount of sophistication to understand that joke, a type of sophistication that would serve someone well in understanding the non-vulgar aspects of our culture.

Okay, I'll be honest--I'm just amused by the image of a child's face as someone tells him that joke.

On a related note (that note being vulgarity and offensiveness)...

I want to know what the RUFNKMers would think about sabotaging a certain contest at a certain early summer festival in a certain neighborhood in Baltimore. In this contest, middle and upper-middle class white folks do their best imitation of the accents of their lower class white neighbors. I can't say I've never used that accent, but I think it's pretty rude to make a spectacle out of it like that. They'd argue that it's all in good fun, we all get along, it's not demeaning. But it is demeaning. It's making fun of the way they talk, reminding them that it's unsophisticated and ignorant. Plus the fact that what people say during the contest is so damn saccharine. "Let's go downy oshun, hun" and other cliches. It ignores so much of what is really said in that accent.

I was thinking of two ways to sabotage the event. First would be to enter the contest and do Yuppie-Speak instead. "You know what's really wrong with this city? Not enough dog parks! It's really a tragedy." "Have you had the guacamole at Joy America? It's to die for!" "Did you hear Wine Source got in a new bottle of Zin?" "I love that new song they're playing on WTMD!" What would really be good would be to imitate yuppies slamming their lower class neighbors: "This neighborhood is great, but I can't stand the white trash. They're always littering and screaming." "I know! Honestly, I think they're dealing drugs from the house across the street from me."

The other act of sabotage would be to use the Baltimore accent, but actually say the things you've heard people with that accent say. This, of course, would be exceedingly misogynistic, racist, and vulgar. How do you think the residents of this certain neighborhood would react if someone entered the contest and started dropping Ns and Bs and MFs and FYs? Or if a couple got up there with a small child between them and started cussing each other out? It might sound something like this.*

Or someone could tell a Baltimore version of the Aristocrats. "That would be so Baltimore!"

* I found this a year ago on this Internet--someone secretly recorded a street argument and posted it to the web. Not safe for work.
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