Thursday, October 14, 2004

How Low Can You Go? Everybody Limbo...

I realize this is the second post today with a dance in the title. Well, when things look good, I feel like dancin', and today, things look good.

Wonkette and Ken Layne, among others, have claimed that this last debate was boring, and on NPR this morning some undecided voter(why the eff do we care what these people think? Oh yeah, they're supposed to decide the election) complained that there were too many "wars of fact." ARE YOU EFFIN' KIDDING ME? You people don't deserve representative democracy. We finally have a moderator asking questions that preclude mindless repetition of talking points. We finally get a debate where the candidates actually have to speak with some knowledge on topics of import to the country, and the best thing people can say is that it was bad TV. We listened to it on the radio - a matter of principle round these parts - so maybe I don't get the joke.

There is one reason I'm sorry I didn't see it on TV. My brother called about 45 minutes in and asked if we were watching it. I said no, we were listening. He said, "Well, then you won't get this joke." He then went into Bill Cosby's "hoof and mouth" riff for about 3 minutes, doing "they're gonna shoot us?" in Shrubya's voice, and "wipe that foam from around your mouth" in Kerry's. While he was doing this, his yuppie lawyer fiance could be heard cursing like a sailor in the background: "Bush you mother effin' liar!! Son of a...". When my brother finished his little comedy bit, he said, "Just a sec. Put the shoe down honey, we don't wanna buy another TV." DC Yuppies are cooler than SF yuppies.

It was nice to hear Shrubya stumble all over himself attempting to justify his positions. He can't talk about jobs, so he talks about education. I do wish he'd asked some teachers what they thought of No Child Left Behind. My understanding is that it encourages teachers to teach the test, not the material, which defeats the whole purpose of education, doesn't it? He can't talk about the economy so he talks about tax cuts. His suggestion that tax cuts put money in people's pockets is insulting. He managed to bring up the already discredited stats about Kerry's tax votes more than twice, which is irrelevant and silly and has lost it's terror effect. 1980 this ain't. We're in an economic decline due not to profligate spending and budget busting by liberal Democrats, but irresponsible tax cutting and ridiculous wartime spending. Big business, ShrubCo's real constituents, have gotten gift after Reaganomic gift for the past 3 years, and things have only gotten worse for most of us.

The Osama Gaffe was for me the quintessential indicator of how much ShrubCo hates us. When Shrubya says "I don't think I ever said 'I'm not worried about Osama'", he is spitting on every citizen. We know he said it, it's on the record in as many places as you care to look. Be he denies he said it, so he must not have, no matter what the record - never mind the liberal (RUFNKM???) media - says. Sound like divine right of kings anyone?

On the question of the Federal Marriage amendment, Kerry gave me the only reason I have so far heard for voting for him and not just against Bush. It was, in fact, as eloquent and succinct defense of liberalism that's been offered since that other Catholic JFK. In essence, he told us he is a man of faith, and his faith dictates certain things, like Gay Marriage Is Wrong. However, in our society we should not legislate faith, we should provide equal rights under the law. I say welcome back to the enlightenment, suckas. This leads us to...

...this whole Mary Cheney flap. I did think referring to the vice president's gay daughter was incautious and unnecessary. However, he wasn't outing her - she's probably the most high profile lesbian in the country. She did provide a decent point of reference for the aforementioned defense of liberalism. Lynn is now out making the rounds calling Kerry "not a good man". ARE YOU EFFIN' KIDDING ME? He used her as an example of those we should extend rights to. Remember, it's YOUR GUY and HIS PEOPLE that hate her for what she is. It's YOUR GUY and HIS PEOPLE that proposed the FMA. I don't think Lynn's really mad about that though. The Cheney's, like the rest of ShrubCo, think they are above public scrutiny. Sullivan actually(I know, I know) makes a good case for how the wingnuts making this complaint is demonstration of blatant homophobia. This is probably the last time I will compliment him on anything.

The last 15 minutes of the debate were pointless. I don't go for the emotional "how human are you? how religious are you?" questions. I know some people think how a candidate answers questions like these indicates something important, but I don't. I did like Kerry's "marrying up" joke, and my girlfriend sneered at Shrubya's "I listen to them and stand up straight" joke. Hey Shrubya, it's the 21st century, most adult women don't think it's their job to mother grown men. But maybe you do need mothering. It might be the only way you can sleep at night.